I’m not Fat – Just Ask the Internet
I looked in the mirror the other morning and was shocked by what I saw. Where did that belly come from? I know it wasn’t there yesterday:
Of course, this is a bad time of the year for gaining weight. It’s getting cold outside and I’m getting less active (“less active” is code for I’m eating too much junk food). Halloween candy, Thanksgiving pies, and Christmas cookies don’t help. A dedicated person would probably fight the junk food temptations, but I decided to try another approach—Internet research that proves I’m not fat (Because you know sitting in front of the computer is going to help burn that fat away).
I just have Big Bones:
I’ve half-jokingly used this excuse for a few years. What does it actually mean to have big bones and does it have any effect on how you carry your weight? A couple of years ago, I read that a rule of thumb is to wrap your middle finger and thumb around your wrist. If they touch, then you have a medium frame size; if they overlap, you have a small frame size; and if they don’t touch, you have a large frame size. Mine don’t touch, so I figured I have big bones.
There is actually an online calculator that is a bit more accurate (or at least makes you think it is a more scientific approach). I tried it, and it confirmed that I have a large frame size.
So what does this mean? Basically, I can carry weight better because of my bone density. Also, I can adjust my BMI number by about ten pounds. So instead of being 30 pounds higher than my ideal weight, I am now only 20 pounds higher. I’m pretty sure that still makes me fat.
I’m preparing to Hibernate:
According to my highly technical research (The internet never lies), we tend to gain a few pounds in the winter because our bodies are preparing for a period of food shortage. So when it gets cold, we eat more to prepare and our body responds by increasing its insulin resistance so we can store more fat.
Basically, the reason I ate too many Reese’s Cups at Halloween and pumpkin pie at Thanksgiving was because my body told me to prepare for winter. It’s not my lack of self-control at all.
So another 5 to 7 pounds is because of this process. So now I’m only 13 pounds overweight. Still chunky, but not as fat as I thought.
It’s just water weight:
Most people’s weight can fluctuate from day to day or week to week. I know that my weight can fluctuate up to about 10 pounds from one month to the next. According to several health and wellness sites I visited, the average person’s weight can fluctuate from 5 to 7 pounds, and water is the main culprit. I know I drink about a gallon of water a day—have for years. Hey, I like water.
A gallon of water weighs roughly 8 pounds (see, that’s my power plant background coming out), so I’m going to make a leap of tangled logic and say that I retain about 8 pounds of water. That brings me down to 5 pounds overweight. What the heck, who isn’t 5 pounds overweight?
So there you have it. I’m not fat, I’m just big-boned, retaining water, and preparing to hibernate for winter. Whew, that was too much work. Wonder what we have around here for a snack?